The Best Road Through, Starts Within

LisaMarie • December 16, 2019

 

Four+ years ago, my business was growing and I said a prayer specifically asking to be sent someone who would complement my work and be able to coach my clients in a way that would give them added depth as a leader.


God (through Barb Wade) sent me success coach and emotional resilience expert, Suzanne Dudley-Schon.


What I love about Suzanne is how she gets that the beingness of leadership matters more than the doingness of leadership.


You can have all of the right leadership systems in place – and still not be a leader worth following.


This week, I’ve asked her to write this blog post for the Upside Thinker on the topic of designing your destiny.


Happy Reading!


In a typical day you can be exposed to thousands of images, whether on billboards, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, YouTube, films, videos, or magazine covers. The visual onslaught, while seemingly processed in the blink of an eye, may ultimately leave you feeling confused and infused with lurking doubt.


The visual presentation can fool you into believing it is a perfect representation of the real thing. Soon you may make comparisons and find your business, your life, and your self… lacking. 


You can jump into action and get lost in the frenzy of trying to achieve and be seen as having achieved. That…that image. And then end up in David Byrne’s song, “Once in a Lifetime”– looking like someone you don’t recognize, standing in a house that doesn’t feel like yours. Asking yourself,


What happened? What’s missing? How did I get here?


In racing after the image and trying to look good in it—your own compass often falls out of your proverbial pocket.


You end up living someone else’s life—probably the one you thought was on that billboard–only to discover that you are standing in your living room hugging painted cardboard. 


You got attached to the idea of what was represented. When in reality, your own version of that would be quite different. 


Because yours would be designed from your own heart’s calling—inside to out, rather than outside to in. 


You can’t walk on a movie set and then magically have a different life. 


You have to build the real thing—day by day, hour by hour, and choice by choice. And without having that compass or “set of plans” that is uniquely yours, you will be building someone else’s … or at best, it’ll be a generic “spec” one that could be anyone’s.


Who you are is formed by what you believe in and what holds meaning for you. 


Find that out. Get clear on what matters to you and why.


Then start building. You will soon find that you are intuitively picking up the right wood, finding the tools, generating the energy, surrounding yourself with people to help and guide you, and friends that are committed to your success.


Action:

The Upside Challenge of the week is to schedule some quiet time to review what you value the most. There is no right or wrong answer. Does your life reflect what you value? No matter “where” you find yourself, recommit to these values. Ensure your daily actions (and how you prioritize them) align accordingly. Notice how small mindful decisions add up. What new habits can support you in this effort?


As Lisa Marie says, the world needs you and your brilliance!



Suzanne Dudley Schon is the founder of CCC Coaching Solutions, a coaching firm that teaches clients how to create freedom, joy, and success in their business and career. 


Her clients include corporate executives, speakers, professors, and creatives including successful fine artists and show business professionals.


Suzanne is also a celebrated author. Her book Out of the Box; A Journey In and Out of Emotional Captivity, details her own journey to freedom from domestic violence a topic for which she is often asked to speak. She co-authored Is Oasis For You? and is a regular contributor to UnderstandingCompassion.com. Her poetry is widely published in literary magazines and in a new book out this year with Blue Light Press. 


Highly credentialed, Suzanne holds a psychology degree from Duke University, as well as credentialing from the International Coach Federation, and is a Certified Master Oasis Trainer, Certified Narrative Coach Core Practitioner, and trained in Reiki, Somatic Experiencing, and Vinyasa Yoga.


In addition to her own coaching business, Suzanne is entering her fourth year as a coach for Upside Thinking, Inc. where she brings fresh insights to clients on how to design their destiny and grow their business.


Involved in countless civic activities, she is also the CEO of Vine Street Associates, CFO of a family foundation, a trustee for the Montshire Museum of Science, and has served for 20 years on the board of Waypoint (Child and Family Services).


An award-winning actress and former champion hunter/jumper rider, Suzanne understands what it takes to succeed. A little bit feisty, she also adds humor and fun to work. 


One of her most joyful achievements is parenting– her two children and three step-children; all currently in various states of fledging. Although she appears to be one of the WASPiest looking people in any given room, Suzanne is actually the daughter of a Dominican woman, speaks fluent Spanish and really excellent improvised gibberish. 

Where Leadership Actually Lives

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 27, 2026
In September 1985 I started my junior year in high school. While I didn't hang out with the most popular bunch, I wasn't considered an outcast either. Perhaps that's one of the places where I learned how to build bridges. Because of it, when I ran for Student Council, much to my own disbelief, I was elected to something. This led to my first official initiation into formal leadership training. While I had taken on roles in school running organizations or organizing projects, this felt like I was officially sanctioned as a leader. I was "doing" leadership. Only leadership isn't something you do, it's something you have to be. You either are a leader or you're not. Lots of folks with titles walk around believing they are a leader or have a lot of knowledge about the topic. Leadership requires wisdom, and wisdom comes from experience. Experience doesn't come from books or even doing. It comes from an inner aptitude when you connect with a purpose that's greater than you. It took me years to understand this ... and many more to be able to share how to get there. That’s the thread that runs through everything I do, including the work we explore in the F Cadre. It’s the work of being the kind of leader who moves life itself. The world will always have opinions about who you should be and what you should chase. And the work that matters asks only that you tune in and follow the pull of what truly matters. Leadership shows up in the person who feels it all, and keeps moving forward. That is where everything worth leading and living begins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to make space for what truly matters—literally. Declutter one small space today (desk, inbox, calendar) and use that as a literal reflection of making room for what truly matters Let that small act remind you: real leadership, real purpose, and real growth always start in the space you choose to make.

Are You Giving God Room to Move in Your Leadership?

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 20, 2026
I've had the tendency to idolize my mentors. I would look past their imperfections, wanting only to see goodness in them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Mentors are just imperfect beings on the same journey you're on, and they've gleaned some wisdom from their missteps that can help you advance faster on your journey. That's the benefit of private coaching. And why I offer so little of it. I used to think I wanted to help everyone ... and that everyone had a problem that I could help them solve. That was a bit unrealistic—and dare I say, arrogant. Today I've got clarity around who I will work with—and who I won't. And it has less to do with their personal aptitude and more about their personal attitude towards God and a willingness to understand Divine Right Timing. You can't outgive God. I'm a living proof of that. What I have today did not come from striving harder or positioning myself in the spotlight. It came from obedience layered over time. ~ From saying yes when it was inconvenient. ~ From giving when the numbers did not justify it. ~ From trusting God with my pace, my work, and my future. I own several hundred acres of land across three states—and grew up in a household where money did not flow freely. My first year working in Federal law enforcement I made less than $25,000 a year. There was no visible pathway from there to here. And every time I’ve tried to outwork Him, outmaneuver Him, or rush what wasn’t ripe, I’ve paid for it in exhaustion and misalignment. Yet, every time I’ve trusted Him, honored timing, and given from obedience rather than fear, the return has exceeded anything I could have engineered. Yes, some things don't make sense, yet when you map out a God plan, you don't try to do all of the heavy lifting yourself. And that takes a different kind of Leader. Someone who doesn't need to be on center stage 24x7. That’s the framework I lead from. That’s the lens I coach through. Because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to give God room to lead. Look at one area of your work or leadership where you’ve been forcing results. Stop trying to control it. Step back and ask God to guide your next move. Take one real action: delegate, pause before deciding, or simply wait on His direction. Watch how alignment show up when you stop doing all the heavy lifting yourself. Lastly, share what you discover with me, your mentor, or someone close to you. Speaking it aloud helps you see your next move clearly and step into it with confidence.

The Unseen Impact of The Work You’re Called To Do

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 13, 2026
Are you thinking of how your choices today are affecting future generations? As someone who doesn't have kids, this used to rarely be on my radar. Yet your choice to bring to life the work that you're called to do will impact the future of your lineage—and folks you've never met. What story will you create based on the choices you make today? See, you create your legacy with the choices that you make right now. The long-lasting impact of your actions can leave behind creations that are innovative and impactful. Take for example the 13-year-old kid who decided to leave a happy note in every bag at the grocery store, just to create a little more cheer in the world. That's legacy. Or what about the kid who practiced free throws every night after school for 3 hours—and then went on to lead his team to the championship in his senior year in college. That's legacy. I remember a few years ago, I hired someone to organize the SOPs and processes for my company. At the time, it felt like a lot of extra work and I wondered if it was worth it. Years later, that choice made everything flow smoother, less rushed, and allowed me and my team to focus on the work we were truly called to do. That’s legacy. Leadership is, as much about what you do in the here and now as it is about legacy for future generations to come. Every one of these moments, big or small, ripples far beyond what you can see today. Each day, each decision plants seeds for generations we may never meet. Tend them with care, with intention, and with faith, trusting that what you do today becomes the foundation for what is possible tomorrow. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to build for someone you will never meet. Choose one action this week that will not benefit you immediately. It could be documenting a process so someone else can lead more easily. Or speaking encouragement that strengthens someone’s confidence long after the moment passes. Or making a decision that protects the future even when the present would prefer convenience. As you do it, hold this prayer quietly, “May this serve beyond me.” Release the outcome. This is leadership that thinks generationally.

When Was the Last Time You Stopped to Hear God?

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
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Where Leadership Actually Lives

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 27, 2026
In September 1985 I started my junior year in high school. While I didn't hang out with the most popular bunch, I wasn't considered an outcast either. Perhaps that's one of the places where I learned how to build bridges. Because of it, when I ran for Student Council, much to my own disbelief, I was elected to something. This led to my first official initiation into formal leadership training. While I had taken on roles in school running organizations or organizing projects, this felt like I was officially sanctioned as a leader. I was "doing" leadership. Only leadership isn't something you do, it's something you have to be. You either are a leader or you're not. Lots of folks with titles walk around believing they are a leader or have a lot of knowledge about the topic. Leadership requires wisdom, and wisdom comes from experience. Experience doesn't come from books or even doing. It comes from an inner aptitude when you connect with a purpose that's greater than you. It took me years to understand this ... and many more to be able to share how to get there. That’s the thread that runs through everything I do, including the work we explore in the F Cadre. It’s the work of being the kind of leader who moves life itself. The world will always have opinions about who you should be and what you should chase. And the work that matters asks only that you tune in and follow the pull of what truly matters. Leadership shows up in the person who feels it all, and keeps moving forward. That is where everything worth leading and living begins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to make space for what truly matters—literally. Declutter one small space today (desk, inbox, calendar) and use that as a literal reflection of making room for what truly matters Let that small act remind you: real leadership, real purpose, and real growth always start in the space you choose to make.

Are You Giving God Room to Move in Your Leadership?

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 20, 2026
I've had the tendency to idolize my mentors. I would look past their imperfections, wanting only to see goodness in them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Mentors are just imperfect beings on the same journey you're on, and they've gleaned some wisdom from their missteps that can help you advance faster on your journey. That's the benefit of private coaching. And why I offer so little of it. I used to think I wanted to help everyone ... and that everyone had a problem that I could help them solve. That was a bit unrealistic—and dare I say, arrogant. Today I've got clarity around who I will work with—and who I won't. And it has less to do with their personal aptitude and more about their personal attitude towards God and a willingness to understand Divine Right Timing. You can't outgive God. I'm a living proof of that. What I have today did not come from striving harder or positioning myself in the spotlight. It came from obedience layered over time. ~ From saying yes when it was inconvenient. ~ From giving when the numbers did not justify it. ~ From trusting God with my pace, my work, and my future. I own several hundred acres of land across three states—and grew up in a household where money did not flow freely. My first year working in Federal law enforcement I made less than $25,000 a year. There was no visible pathway from there to here. And every time I’ve tried to outwork Him, outmaneuver Him, or rush what wasn’t ripe, I’ve paid for it in exhaustion and misalignment. Yet, every time I’ve trusted Him, honored timing, and given from obedience rather than fear, the return has exceeded anything I could have engineered. Yes, some things don't make sense, yet when you map out a God plan, you don't try to do all of the heavy lifting yourself. And that takes a different kind of Leader. Someone who doesn't need to be on center stage 24x7. That’s the framework I lead from. That’s the lens I coach through. Because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to give God room to lead. Look at one area of your work or leadership where you’ve been forcing results. Stop trying to control it. Step back and ask God to guide your next move. Take one real action: delegate, pause before deciding, or simply wait on His direction. Watch how alignment show up when you stop doing all the heavy lifting yourself. Lastly, share what you discover with me, your mentor, or someone close to you. Speaking it aloud helps you see your next move clearly and step into it with confidence.

The Unseen Impact of The Work You’re Called To Do

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 13, 2026
Are you thinking of how your choices today are affecting future generations? As someone who doesn't have kids, this used to rarely be on my radar. Yet your choice to bring to life the work that you're called to do will impact the future of your lineage—and folks you've never met. What story will you create based on the choices you make today? See, you create your legacy with the choices that you make right now. The long-lasting impact of your actions can leave behind creations that are innovative and impactful. Take for example the 13-year-old kid who decided to leave a happy note in every bag at the grocery store, just to create a little more cheer in the world. That's legacy. Or what about the kid who practiced free throws every night after school for 3 hours—and then went on to lead his team to the championship in his senior year in college. That's legacy. I remember a few years ago, I hired someone to organize the SOPs and processes for my company. At the time, it felt like a lot of extra work and I wondered if it was worth it. Years later, that choice made everything flow smoother, less rushed, and allowed me and my team to focus on the work we were truly called to do. That’s legacy. Leadership is, as much about what you do in the here and now as it is about legacy for future generations to come. Every one of these moments, big or small, ripples far beyond what you can see today. Each day, each decision plants seeds for generations we may never meet. Tend them with care, with intention, and with faith, trusting that what you do today becomes the foundation for what is possible tomorrow. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to build for someone you will never meet. Choose one action this week that will not benefit you immediately. It could be documenting a process so someone else can lead more easily. Or speaking encouragement that strengthens someone’s confidence long after the moment passes. Or making a decision that protects the future even when the present would prefer convenience. As you do it, hold this prayer quietly, “May this serve beyond me.” Release the outcome. This is leadership that thinks generationally.

When Was the Last Time You Stopped to Hear God?

By Lisa Marie Platske • April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
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