Choosing to Become a Leader Worth Following

Lisa Marie Platske • September 25, 2023

Rocco* was used to being #1.

 

Struggle wasn't part of his life.

 

At least not in public.

 

He ran with a fast crowd and was used to being the life of the party.

 

~ Cars.

~ Two homes.

~ A beautiful wife.

~ And a weekly payroll that ran him more than most people made all year.

 

His employees called him as Mr. R., and when he walked in a room, you leaned in as you just knew he’d have something important to say.

 

Yet Rocco was on the verge of burnout when we met, afraid to tell anyone what was really going on in his life.

 

Our paths crossed when I consulted for a board where one of his employees was a volunteer -- and she had arranged for one of their meetings to be held at his office.

 

We met in the hallway and had an interesting conversation which led to setting up a time to meet at a local coffee shop to continue our conversation.

 

I was thinking it was a "getting-to-know-you" meeting and had no idea Rocco would tell me about his struggles.

 

Despite his air of confidence, Rocco’s life was spinning out of control and he couldn’t figure out how to make it stop.

 

I understood because I’ve been there... unsure of who to trust and too afraid tell anyone about the mess I'd created in my life.

 

When you don’t stack your wins,  everything around you starts to feel like a loss.

 

You begin doubting your worth and value and when that happens, it’s hard to

attract the right opportunities, be in loving relationships, or enjoy peace of mind.

 

When you are afraid to be vulnerable and just keep doing more of the same thing louder or harder, you'll stay stuck or worse, as you'll risk losing it all.

 

And that's where Rocco was.

 

The charade he was playing was like a house of cards about ready to crumble.

 

~ His wife was threatening to leave him.

~ He was close to personal bankruptcy.

~ And he was having trouble sleeping.

 

Rather than get clear about what was going on inside his business and doubling down on his leadership, he trusted a few wrong people and got in a bigger hole.

 

Rocco and I worked together -- and he got himself dialed in.

 

See, Rocco lost his way ... like we all do.

 

He was a brilliant businessman who had a series of missteps that caused him to lose money to people he trusted.

 

This eroded his confidence and he began doubling down on everyone and everything outside of himself.

 

~ I helped him remember who he was.

~ I gave him permission to go after what he wanted.

~ And we restructured his debt ...

 

... and then stacked wins centered on his original why for getting into business, getting him out of the hole he was in.

 

We worked on his marriage too, starting with having him read 'The Love Dare.'

 

He and his wife are celebrating their 23rd anniversary this year.

 

And he told me he now sleeps like a baby.

 

All from the courage to be vulnerable.

 

That's purpose-led leadership.

 

So, if you're wanting to learn more about how to be a leader worth following or just leadership in general, just reply to this email for details.

 

This is my purpose

 

This is my calling.

 

The World Needs You and Your Brilliance.

 

ACTION: The Upside Challenge of the week is to assess where you’re at and vulnerably share your truth with someone you trust. 

 

You can’t make the difference you’re called to make if you don’t dial up your leadership.

 

And again, the world needs you and your brilliance.

By Lisa Marie Platske January 26, 2026
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." ~ Helen Keller Purpose. The dictionary definition is, " the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. " You were put on the planet for a reason ... a purpose. And, part of the joy of the journey is to be in the discovery and fulfillment of that divine purpose . Perhaps that's why Helen Keller said what she said. Too often, folks get sidetracked by fame and fortune, or comfort and easy. While they each have their allure, they will never bring you happiness. True happiness comes from meaning. Over the decades, there have been countless subjects and research projects on the topic of happiness. The results of all of them have pointed back to this truth. When I think about the leaders that I've had the privilege of working with, the ones that were the happiest weren't the ones that had situations that were easy. Actually, life came down pretty hard on some of them and they were in peril. While they came to me seeking answers about how to right the ship, the journey rarely involved signing a multi-million dollar deal that got them to happiness island. It was the ability to peel away each layer of their circumstances and see it through the lens of their divine mission and purpose. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice where your influence thrive. At times, we can lose sight of what truly matters. So today, observe the work, conversations, and moments where you naturally make a difference. Do more of those things, even in small ways. Your purpose is revealed in the places where your leadership produces impact and meaning.
By Lisa Marie Platske January 19, 2026
By Lisa Marie Platske January 12, 2026
No matter how happy someone may seem, they have moments when they question if they can go on. And no matter how strong someone may appear, they have days when they feel like they're falling apart. That's one of the most confusing aspects of leadership. See, most leaders feel that because they're the one at the helm steering the ship, they should have it together and be "on" 24x7. And that's unrealistic. Yet that belief has caused many leaders to sink their ship because of the inability to reach out and ask for help. No one can go it alone. Every leader needs someone to lean on. Phrases like "Only the strong survive." and "You gotta just 'man' up." do more damage than good. I learned this when I was working in Federal law enforcement and 9/11 hit. The superhuman requests to work hours that pushed the body to the limits were a recipe for certain disaster. Men and women who may have needed someone to talk to themselves to process their grief were thrust into the grim reality that they were needed more than ever—and needed to be stronger than they knew how to do. One of the NYPD beat cops that I had befriended was in the middle of a shift when he had a full-blown meltdown on 5th Avenue in New York City six months after 9/11. The walk of leadership never has been—and never will be—a solo affair. You need other folks around you that you can trust and rely on in good times and not-so-good times. And I'm not talking about a friend, spouse, or family member. I'm talking about a trusted advisor with whom you can turn matter what is working or on fire. Because every leader deserves a space to be real, to be guided, and to be reminded of the truth of who they are . The kind of space I’ve devoted my life to creating for those called to lead from purpose. And when leaders have that kind of support, the moments that once felt too heavy begin to make sense. They find the strength to keep going because they’re no longer doing it on their own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to think and name one person who you can turn to when leadership feels heavy. Reach out to one of them this week. Tell the truth about where you are. Because even leaders need a place to lean.
By Lisa Marie Platske January 5, 2026
As I look at how to move forward with a new year...I’m tasked with identifying what to do to take action in the here and now. It sometimes feels hard... which is why I’m grateful for friends who lend a listening ear. It feels as if no matter how much I wipe the surface of my white board, my old writing shows through. Leaders face this challenge all the time. ~ How to erase what’s holding them back... ... and how to embrace what will propel them forward without old stories seeping through. I believe that’s why this time of year is confronting for people. They’re faced with the dilemma of honestly facing whether they’ve taken action on what they said they wanted last year ... and looking at how much energy and effort they put into their commitments... while assessing what's still flippin' gettin' in the way. Some people run and hide – and then lie to themselves. Others play the blame game. Only the courageous take personal responsibility for their shortcomings... with renewed energy to do better moving forward. To do this, you’ve got to get curious. Looking at where you’re at in this moment will determine how successful you will be tomorrow. And, you can’t get to self-regulation without self-awareness so that’s also critical. You’re born with a certain success set point and tolerance for risk... ... as well as a boatload of behavioral characteristics... ... some which serve you and others that get in the way of your success. Over time, you can make adjustments or choose to step into old habits. Blind spots are places we just can’t see on our own. Upside Leaders was born out of my desire to walk alongside leaders in this very space... where the unseen becomes visible, and small, intentional shifts create lasting transformation. When I spoke with a friend, he said perhaps it's just allowing for a small shift to the left or right, rather than an uncovering. For me that 1% tilt has made all the difference... ... especially when I look through that lens with humility... ... which precedes personal and professional growth. You cannot improve where you’re headed unless you improve yourself. See this as a time to erase what is no longer relevant... put some effort into making sure the old writing on your "white board" doesn't seep through. You are writing a new story. ... look in the mirror... ... and commit to doing better. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to look at your current goals and circle the one that feels the most familiar. Challenge yourself to reimagine it and to stretch it by 1%. Ask, “ What would this look like if I led with full conviction instead of comfort? ” Then pause and listen for what you’re being asked to release so greater vision can unfold through you.
More Posts
By Lisa Marie Platske January 26, 2026
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." ~ Helen Keller Purpose. The dictionary definition is, " the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. " You were put on the planet for a reason ... a purpose. And, part of the joy of the journey is to be in the discovery and fulfillment of that divine purpose . Perhaps that's why Helen Keller said what she said. Too often, folks get sidetracked by fame and fortune, or comfort and easy. While they each have their allure, they will never bring you happiness. True happiness comes from meaning. Over the decades, there have been countless subjects and research projects on the topic of happiness. The results of all of them have pointed back to this truth. When I think about the leaders that I've had the privilege of working with, the ones that were the happiest weren't the ones that had situations that were easy. Actually, life came down pretty hard on some of them and they were in peril. While they came to me seeking answers about how to right the ship, the journey rarely involved signing a multi-million dollar deal that got them to happiness island. It was the ability to peel away each layer of their circumstances and see it through the lens of their divine mission and purpose. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice where your influence thrive. At times, we can lose sight of what truly matters. So today, observe the work, conversations, and moments where you naturally make a difference. Do more of those things, even in small ways. Your purpose is revealed in the places where your leadership produces impact and meaning.
By Lisa Marie Platske January 19, 2026
By Lisa Marie Platske January 12, 2026
No matter how happy someone may seem, they have moments when they question if they can go on. And no matter how strong someone may appear, they have days when they feel like they're falling apart. That's one of the most confusing aspects of leadership. See, most leaders feel that because they're the one at the helm steering the ship, they should have it together and be "on" 24x7. And that's unrealistic. Yet that belief has caused many leaders to sink their ship because of the inability to reach out and ask for help. No one can go it alone. Every leader needs someone to lean on. Phrases like "Only the strong survive." and "You gotta just 'man' up." do more damage than good. I learned this when I was working in Federal law enforcement and 9/11 hit. The superhuman requests to work hours that pushed the body to the limits were a recipe for certain disaster. Men and women who may have needed someone to talk to themselves to process their grief were thrust into the grim reality that they were needed more than ever—and needed to be stronger than they knew how to do. One of the NYPD beat cops that I had befriended was in the middle of a shift when he had a full-blown meltdown on 5th Avenue in New York City six months after 9/11. The walk of leadership never has been—and never will be—a solo affair. You need other folks around you that you can trust and rely on in good times and not-so-good times. And I'm not talking about a friend, spouse, or family member. I'm talking about a trusted advisor with whom you can turn matter what is working or on fire. Because every leader deserves a space to be real, to be guided, and to be reminded of the truth of who they are . The kind of space I’ve devoted my life to creating for those called to lead from purpose. And when leaders have that kind of support, the moments that once felt too heavy begin to make sense. They find the strength to keep going because they’re no longer doing it on their own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to think and name one person who you can turn to when leadership feels heavy. Reach out to one of them this week. Tell the truth about where you are. Because even leaders need a place to lean.
By Lisa Marie Platske January 5, 2026
As I look at how to move forward with a new year...I’m tasked with identifying what to do to take action in the here and now. It sometimes feels hard... which is why I’m grateful for friends who lend a listening ear. It feels as if no matter how much I wipe the surface of my white board, my old writing shows through. Leaders face this challenge all the time. ~ How to erase what’s holding them back... ... and how to embrace what will propel them forward without old stories seeping through. I believe that’s why this time of year is confronting for people. They’re faced with the dilemma of honestly facing whether they’ve taken action on what they said they wanted last year ... and looking at how much energy and effort they put into their commitments... while assessing what's still flippin' gettin' in the way. Some people run and hide – and then lie to themselves. Others play the blame game. Only the courageous take personal responsibility for their shortcomings... with renewed energy to do better moving forward. To do this, you’ve got to get curious. Looking at where you’re at in this moment will determine how successful you will be tomorrow. And, you can’t get to self-regulation without self-awareness so that’s also critical. You’re born with a certain success set point and tolerance for risk... ... as well as a boatload of behavioral characteristics... ... some which serve you and others that get in the way of your success. Over time, you can make adjustments or choose to step into old habits. Blind spots are places we just can’t see on our own. Upside Leaders was born out of my desire to walk alongside leaders in this very space... where the unseen becomes visible, and small, intentional shifts create lasting transformation. When I spoke with a friend, he said perhaps it's just allowing for a small shift to the left or right, rather than an uncovering. For me that 1% tilt has made all the difference... ... especially when I look through that lens with humility... ... which precedes personal and professional growth. You cannot improve where you’re headed unless you improve yourself. See this as a time to erase what is no longer relevant... put some effort into making sure the old writing on your "white board" doesn't seep through. You are writing a new story. ... look in the mirror... ... and commit to doing better. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to look at your current goals and circle the one that feels the most familiar. Challenge yourself to reimagine it and to stretch it by 1%. Ask, “ What would this look like if I led with full conviction instead of comfort? ” Then pause and listen for what you’re being asked to release so greater vision can unfold through you.
More Posts