Who Are You When Things Get Tough?

Most folks understand the concept of rest. When you expend "x" amount of energy, your body is going to require you to replenish. Yet there's a certain type of weariness that no amount of sleep will produce the feeling of being energized in your body. When you're exhausted to the core, and it feels as if you've been wrung out like a dish rag, that level of fatigue is only overcome by giving your Soul rest. Living in a world where books about how to achieve more are plentiful, this isn't a conversation that's abundant in the business space. You've got to know how to hustle and grind when things get tough. I grew up hearing, "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going." I never heard about The Power of the Pause, or refueling my Soul. And so I pushed. And pushed a little more. And a little more. And figured I was just doing life wrong as all I got was more and more tired ... and a little bit angrier on the inside. Rest isn't about sleep. It's about peace. When you operate from this place, the trials that you face are easier to handle. If you spend your precious minutes criticizing, worrying, or comparing yourself to others, you cannot live your best life and lead others effectively. Out-of-control emotions fueled by fear or anxiety may make you feel as if there's more for you to do or you're not doing enough. Yet that's just fear. ~ Fear of getting something wrong and messing up your life ~ Fear of not figuring out what you're 'supposed' to be doing ~ Fear of disappointing yourself and others if you do or don't do something I could go on and on. Just pick one. And fear can be exhausting. It steals your peace, clouds your judgment, and keeps you stuck in cycles that wear you down from the inside out. This is why I’ve devoted my life’s work to walking alongside purpose-led leaders. Because I’ve seen what happens when you try to push through that kind of soul-deep fatigue alone or to keep going because people are counting on you, even when you’re running on fumes. And I also know what’s possible when you choose to lead from a place of alignment, when your soul is at peace, not just your calendar. Because when you lead from real rest, you show up steady and with ease. That kind of leadership is born from surrender. So pause. Set down the pressure to prove. Rest. Rest your mind from overthinking. Rest your spirit from striving. And most of all, rest in God. Remember, the world needs you and brilliance now more than ever. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to pause and realign before your next move. In the middle of your busy day, before you jump into the next task, stop. Take a deep breath and ground yourself. Ask this clearly: Is this the work I’m called to do right now? Does it align with who I am and the purpose I carry? If it doesn’t, lean into the wisdom to delegate or let it go. Leading well means knowing where to invest your energy and where to release control. This pause is a moment to realign your body, mind, and spirit so you lead from peace, clarity, and strength.

Good things are waiting for you around every single corner. One of my favorite movie lines comes from "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" when Dev Patel says, " Everything will be alright in the end, so if it's not alright it's not the end. " There is a 2nd part of his quote that few folks remember - and that is, " The only real failure is the failure to try, and the measure of success is how we cope with disappointment. " I get that it’s not always been easy for you. It may feel like heartache and disappointment show up around every corner. Yet I hope you can see how everything that happens to you can be turned into good. I recently asked a client if they believed that God made mistakes—and they said "no". So if God doesn't make mistakes and all is perfect, then every situation, time, and place you've been in has been given to you for a reason. And they paused, sighed, and agreed. This is why I believe so much in the sovereignty of your being, and your ability to live from a place of choice and intention. When you get this, it makes you different than the many others on the planet who complain about their fate or circumstances. Courageous leadership takes, well, courage. You were never promised easy on your journey—and you can create ease and grace by remembering that you are the master of your fate and the captain of your destiny. That’s the foundation I built my business on. When I first began creating my programs and retreats, I didn’t do it because it was simple or convenient. I did it because I saw a gap between where people were and who they were called to be. I knew the pain of disappointment and the ache of untapped potential and I also knew there was a way through it with purpose, alignment, and leadership. So I started small. One courageous moment at a time. Each program, each retreat, each private session was designed to meet people right where they were and help them rise. I believe you can rise, too. There is more for you. There is so much more within you. Good things are waiting for you around every single corner. Go shine your light. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stand tall—literally. Each morning this week, before you start your day, stand up, roll your shoulders back, plant your feet firmly, and take one deep breath as if you’re stepping fully into your purpose. Then do one round of box breathing: Inhale for 4 counts Hold for 4 counts Exhale for 4 counts Hold for 4 counts Repeat this cycle twice. Let your body remember: You are the captain of your destiny. You are walking in purpose. You are ready for what’s next.

Napoleon Hill wrote how thought was the source of all riches, material, physical, and/or spiritual. Then, when I read an excerpt from his Positive Mental Attitude Success Course, I was reminded of the value of mentorship. To multiply your mind power, you can’t go it alone. He recommended having at least 4 types of talent in your life: a spiritual adviser, a financial adviser, a health adviser, and a personal adviser. Without ever reading his curriculum, I recognize it’s how I’ve set up my life. Because to get what you want ... you can’t do it alone. Lord knows I've tried ... Growing up, I was afraid of making a mistake or misstep. I walked on eggshells every day. This put an immense amount of pressure on me. Imagine trying to be perfect! Looking back, I could see that the grown-ups around me had made some big mistakes that led to some pretty unhappy results. My little girl self didn't want to suffer through any unnecessary painful circumstances so I took it upon myself to try for straight A's in life. This led to learning how to lie to look good and cover up the mistakes I made. The harder I tried, the more I just couldn't figure out how to get it right 100% of the time. By the time I got to my 30's, I realized I had to figure out how to get along with disappointment and imperfection. Trying to live like this was stressful - and I was tired of trying to do life on my own. I didn't have to be best friends with imperfection, however, we did need to hang out once in a while. :) That's when I got my first mentor in Federal law enforcement. He was the person I called when I just couldn't figure something out. Looking back, he was like a secret weapon in my career path, steering me from potential minefields every week. I'm not sure I would have survived some of my assignments without him. Over the years, there have been countless guides, mentors, allies, and coaches that have advised me on different legs of my journey. What most people fail to see are the dozens of folks that are standing behind the leader. Mentorship is essential. And it’s not just about strategy or success. It’s about alignment and surrounding yourself with people who speak life into your purpose and hold you to the highest version of yourself, even when you’re in the valley. You were never meant to carry the weight of leadership by yourself. You may be the one out front, yet you’re not supposed to be the only one in the fight. If you’ve been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or like you’re the only one who gets it, this is your invitation. Get your people. The breakthrough you’ve been praying for might not come through hustle. It might come through alignment. This is the season to walk with wise counsel. Because no leader goes it alone, not one who finishes well. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify who’s in your corner. Take 10 minutes this week to reflect on the four types of advisers Napoleon Hill spoke about: Spiritual Financial Health Personal Now, write down one name for each category, someone you trust or could reach out to. If you come up short, don’t panic. Instead, choose one category where you feel the most need and reach out to someone this week. Ask for a conversation, schedule a coffee, or simply send a message of appreciation and curiosity. You don’t have to build your circle overnight. You just have to start. Because the path to wisdom, clarity, and strength begins with one brave ask.