How To Immediately Have Power In Words
Lisa Marie Platske • August 1, 2016
To speak powerfully, you need to know the power in words, the ones that increase your influence and the ones that undermine it.
Words have the power to conjure up pictures in our mind.
Upside-Thinking-Lisa-Marie-Platske-power-in-words-august1-pic
And, sometimes those words have past meanings associated with them.
I was blessed with being surrounded by a large family growing up.
While we were a bit noisy when we were all together, as I reflect back, I recognize that it was our own language of love.
Words and language give us the ability to communicate with strength and confidence or wishy-washiness (yep, it’s a word) and uncertainty.
My grandfather used words in ways that still make me smile – and have affected how I see myself.
When I showed up at his house before prom, my grandfather said that I looked “solid”.
Not exactly the word that most teenage girls want to hear on their big night out.
But, my grandfather meant that in the best way possible as he saw a strength within me that said that I meant business – I was capable of taking care of myself.
At the time, I was mortified.
Solid.
Really?
Why not beautiful? Sexy? Dare, I say “hot”? (That would be kind of creepy coming from my grandfather…)
Now, I assure you that the words I wanted to hear were not words that even I could find to say to myself as my awkward stage lasted for decades and my self-esteem would vacillate from high to none.
But, yes, inside, there were parts of me that were solid.
And, that is what my grandfather saw.
In my work at Upside Thinking, I speak a lot about the power of positioning.
It’s weaved throughout the 5th Pillar of Leadership, Building a Meaningful and Memorable Presence and it begins with language and the words you choose to use. (We talk about this on day #3 of Design Your Destiny Live™.)
You have to recognize that every word you choose has a meaning.
You have to understand the biology behind positioning, leadership, and presence.
Unfortunately, most people speak on autopilot.
If you look at the research on positioning, you’ll discover that it’s more than how people hear you, it’s how they connect the dots.
The Power In Words
Research shows that people make a decision about how talented, educated, financially secure, etc. you are in 8 seconds or less.
Using words that increase your ability to position yourself so that you are fully seen, heard, recognized, and rewarded happens in a matter of seconds.
If you’re serious about increasing your influence and showing up as a leader that gets noticed, be sure to get rid of these four (4) phrases:
- I’ll try. As Yoda said, “Do or do not. There is no try.”
- I guess. Pretty much the same as the above. Leaders know. Even if they don’t get it right, they are willing to step out on a limb, take a risk, and with their knowing state their direction with firm belief.
- I hope. “I hope this will work out.” What?!? I trust that everything – yes EVERYTHING – is designed for my greatest good. That is the path of an Upside leader.
- I am. This phrase is one of the most powerful phrases in the universe when used to describe who you are – Powerful.
Beautiful. Strong. However, when you use this phrase to describe what you do, the brain falls asleep. Fast asleep. And, the person who looks like they’re listening is giving you the polite head nod. So, use this phrase loud and proud when you’re in front of the mirror, but not when you’re speaking to others.
Action Item:
The Upside Challenge of the week is to pay attention to your language. Are you aware of the words you are using and the effect they have on increasing or decreasing your influence? Your ability to be seen as a leader? Your ability to design your destiny?
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 26, 2025
Have you ever had one of those days where it feels as if nothing went the way you planned? ~ You’re late for work or... ~ You spill something on your favorite shirt or.. ~ You get in a fender bender. Or, worse… ~ You get a call from your doctor and are diagnosed with something you wouldn’t wish on your enemies. ~ You lose your biggest client and/or you lose your job. ~ The love of your life says they don’t want to be with you anymore. Let’s be real… There are days when life can be heart-wrenchingly painful. And, there may be days when you want to stay in bed and wait for tomorrow to come. It's easy to forget that what we tell ourselves about these situations matters. The story we tell ourselves and others become part of our beliefs. I get how easy it can be to give up on days like this, and how tempting it can be to give in to the feeling that you did something wrong to cause this. I’ve been there. In business… … I’ve lost close relationships. … I lost big opportunities. … I lost my belief in myself. And I’ve been lied to and betrayed more times than I can count. There was a time, years ago when I lost sight of my Divine mission, and applied for a job when I had a full book of coaching clients. My confidence took a beating and I didn’t know how to move forward. The good news is that with the support of friends, family, and a strong coach - and leaning on the Holy Spirit - I got clear on what I needed and what was important to me. And I practiced forgiveness, for myself and others. I told myself through each challenge, that these were great lessons, full of learning that I could share. And, I created a community where thinkers, leaders, and world changers could come to do their work. You can focus on what you see as negative in the situation and make excuses for why you’re standing still. Or you can find the upside and create solutions to get to where you want to go. It’s really your decision. You are where you choose to be. So, if you’re going through one of those days in your life… …or one of those weeks… …or one of those months… …or what feels like one of those years… I get it. Take a Godwalk. Place your attention on where you want your focus to be. Decide what the most constructive story to tell yourself that aligns with what you want would be. Then, commit to taking action on what you truly want. Make peace with anyone with whom you are out of alignment with in your life using the power of forgiveness. The 1st person on your list may need to be you. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to practice the art of writing your life when things are hard. Being aware of the story you are telling yourself with each experience. What's the story that will serve you best so that you move forward productively? If you get stuck, take a God walk, and then pick up the phone to connect with someone who appreciates who you are - and where you are on your life's journey.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 19, 2025
Most people believe they're good at keeping commitments. They wake up, show up, and do their best for others. Yet that same desire to do good for the people around them can create limitations on the ability to keep commitments to themselves. Everyone has an internal account that holds what I call integrity currency. Think about it like this… Every time you make a promise or break a promise to a client or someone you care about, you either add a coin, or you subtract a coin from your account. The coins you deposit are made up of magnetic energy, making you less or more attractive to yourself and others. The human body is an electrical body made up of charged particles - and has its own magnetic fields. When you make a promise to yourself, like taking an afternoon off to rest, and you fail to honor it, it is a double break of your integrity and your account is withdrawn TWICE. Why? Being out of integrity with yourself causes internal stress, shame, and regret. You didn't keep your word to the most important person in your life — YOU. Because the coins act like magnets, when you make deposits in your account, your account grows and begins paying dividends. The result is that you begin magnetizing opportunities with ease. The opposite is also true. As your account shrinks from being out of integrity with yourself or others, opportunities bounce off of you and seem just out of reach when once they were plentiful. You may work hard and can’t seem to get further ahead. When this is happening, I tell clients to check their integrity account. ~ Have you failed to honor commitments to yourself or others? ~ Are you depleted? ~ Is your account overdrawn? Everything you do is creating a pathway in your brain to get you closer to what you want...or further away. You choose in every moment who you are, what you want, and why it matters. Leading with integrity doesn’t just impact your life; it creates ripple effects in your business, your team, and your ability to lead at the highest level. This is why the leaders in my Upside Leaders program learn to strengthen their integrity account and build a life that aligns with their values and vision. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to imagine yourself as a bank account. Where are you spending? Where are you investing? When and how are you making deposits? At the end of the month, quarter, and year, what do you want your statements to look like? Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance now more than ever.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 12, 2025
My mom and I had a rocky relationship growing up. After my Daddy left, I suppose I was more affected than anyone understood. This was the 1970's and 'divorce' was a dirty word. Folks don't want to talk about the emotional carnage it leaves. My mom was forced into a situation she didn't choose or want ... ... and me and my younger sister were left to deal with it the best we could. In my teens, I blamed my mom for lots of things — and was disrespectful to her more than I'd like to admit. Perhaps it was because we were more alike than not ... ... and I didn't have any tools to deal with how I felt. Regardless, when I left home after college, I didn't leave on great terms. And at the time, I was too stubborn to make amends. Yes, there were seasons when I didn't speak to her or she didn't speak to me. And I never felt good when those were going on. At 55 years old, I have dealt with and healed the heartache, trauma, and pain that happened early on in life. It's given me deep compassion and wisdom ... and I desire to be able to love like Mother Mary does. This has helped me tremendously in my leadership coaching practice. While my mom and I still have our bumps now and then, today she's one of my favorite people to spend time with. Even when I'm frustrated or she pushes my buttons, I love who she is. I tell clients you can determine what you value by examining where you invest your time, energy, or money. My mom gets a lot of all three ... and I wasn't with her on Mother's Day yesterday. And we've got plans next month to go to the Jersey shore together as a family — as well as four other getaways, and one just the two of us. Whether you're close to your mom or not, or whether she's here or passed away, I hope you can reflect on one good memory today. Just one. If you're a mom, I hope you had a happy Mother’s Day. We don’t become strong leaders because everything goes smoothly. We become strong because we’ve lived through what we thought might break us. We lead how we heal. The work I’ve done with my mom ... learning to forgive, to listen, to understand ... that’s the same work I bring into the room with clients. You can't lead people well if you haven't faced your own stuff. The more I’ve grown, the more space I can hold. The more I’ve softened, the stronger I’ve become. And the more I’ve healed, the more clarity I have when it comes to what truly matters. That’s leadership. It's the transformation more than the titles or the wins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to reflect on one part of your story that shaped who you are today. Maybe it’s something you used to hide or pretend didn't happen. Ask yourself: how does this part of my journey still influence how I lead, decide, or relate to others? The goal isn’t to fix anything — it’s to get honest about how your inner story is shaping your outer leadership. Because the more whole you become, the more powerfully you can lead.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 7, 2025
Siam struggled for years and tried everything he knew to do. First, he rebuilt his website. Then, he spent money getting people to listen to his podcast. Next, he mapped out a social media strategy with a digital marketing agency. Lastly, he went all in on paid advertising. He was working long hours, missing out on time with his family. And Siam’s bank account kept shrinking, and he couldn't figure out why nothing seemed to be working. And that’s when we met. Siam was the older brother of a friend of mine, and she thought I could help him see the missing piece. I agreed to meet with him over Zoom. He was direct and told me he wasn't sure why his sister wanted us to meet. I, too, was direct with him and shared that she watched him struggle in business -- and believed the work I do would be valuable to jumpstart new opportunities. I shared my desire to listen and be of service if he was interested. Still a bit bristly in his demeanor, he said he wanted to hear what I had to say. After I asked a few questions, over 30 minutes, he softened and started to open up about the business. I began putting the pieces together and could see that Siam thought he had to do business like everyone else, and it was killing him. He spent the last 24 months trying to grow the business with very little to show for it, and his confidence had taken a hit. I could see through his bravado with a whole lot of tenderness because I’ve been there. When you don’t stack the wins fast enough, everything around you starts to feel like a loss. You begin doubting your worth and value, and when that happens, ... ~ it’s hard to build a great website, ~ it's hard to write on social media, and ~ it's hard to attract the people you’re called to serve. Sometimes, you can't see what you need to shift, so you start chasing tactics trying to fix the problem. Rarely are tactics the issue for a stunted career or a stalled business venture. If you don’t first figure out who you are, what you want, and why it matters, none of the tactical elements for business growth will work for you. You've got to get clear on your mission, values, and vision. From there, you can look at patterns getting in the way. We all have blind spots, and no one can see their pitfalls on their own. When you get clarity, confidence follows. Then, bigger opportunities will start to show up. Yet, if you could see your blocks, you'd remove them. Siam got that he couldn’t walk this journey alone. The best leaders get it. To get the greatest ROI, focus on leadership. Focusing on tactics, technology, or other shiny objects won't get you the big paycheck. Siam and I worked together one-on-one, and he got his leadership IQ dialed in. I was also able to help him write new marketing materials -- after he got clear, and the results led to a 39% increase in business. Today, he’s making his mark on the world. Increase your leadership IQ because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify the one thing that is draining your energy and not delivering results. Maybe it’s a commitment that no longer aligns, a habit that is having you overwork, or a task someone else could handle. Let it go. Growth isn’t about doing more; it’s about making room for what truly matters. When you clear distractions, you create space for divine opportunities to flow. Today, remove one thing that’s holding you back and trust that what’s meant for you will rise in its place.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 26, 2025
Have you ever had one of those days where it feels as if nothing went the way you planned? ~ You’re late for work or... ~ You spill something on your favorite shirt or.. ~ You get in a fender bender. Or, worse… ~ You get a call from your doctor and are diagnosed with something you wouldn’t wish on your enemies. ~ You lose your biggest client and/or you lose your job. ~ The love of your life says they don’t want to be with you anymore. Let’s be real… There are days when life can be heart-wrenchingly painful. And, there may be days when you want to stay in bed and wait for tomorrow to come. It's easy to forget that what we tell ourselves about these situations matters. The story we tell ourselves and others become part of our beliefs. I get how easy it can be to give up on days like this, and how tempting it can be to give in to the feeling that you did something wrong to cause this. I’ve been there. In business… … I’ve lost close relationships. … I lost big opportunities. … I lost my belief in myself. And I’ve been lied to and betrayed more times than I can count. There was a time, years ago when I lost sight of my Divine mission, and applied for a job when I had a full book of coaching clients. My confidence took a beating and I didn’t know how to move forward. The good news is that with the support of friends, family, and a strong coach - and leaning on the Holy Spirit - I got clear on what I needed and what was important to me. And I practiced forgiveness, for myself and others. I told myself through each challenge, that these were great lessons, full of learning that I could share. And, I created a community where thinkers, leaders, and world changers could come to do their work. You can focus on what you see as negative in the situation and make excuses for why you’re standing still. Or you can find the upside and create solutions to get to where you want to go. It’s really your decision. You are where you choose to be. So, if you’re going through one of those days in your life… …or one of those weeks… …or one of those months… …or what feels like one of those years… I get it. Take a Godwalk. Place your attention on where you want your focus to be. Decide what the most constructive story to tell yourself that aligns with what you want would be. Then, commit to taking action on what you truly want. Make peace with anyone with whom you are out of alignment with in your life using the power of forgiveness. The 1st person on your list may need to be you. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to practice the art of writing your life when things are hard. Being aware of the story you are telling yourself with each experience. What's the story that will serve you best so that you move forward productively? If you get stuck, take a God walk, and then pick up the phone to connect with someone who appreciates who you are - and where you are on your life's journey.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 19, 2025
Most people believe they're good at keeping commitments. They wake up, show up, and do their best for others. Yet that same desire to do good for the people around them can create limitations on the ability to keep commitments to themselves. Everyone has an internal account that holds what I call integrity currency. Think about it like this… Every time you make a promise or break a promise to a client or someone you care about, you either add a coin, or you subtract a coin from your account. The coins you deposit are made up of magnetic energy, making you less or more attractive to yourself and others. The human body is an electrical body made up of charged particles - and has its own magnetic fields. When you make a promise to yourself, like taking an afternoon off to rest, and you fail to honor it, it is a double break of your integrity and your account is withdrawn TWICE. Why? Being out of integrity with yourself causes internal stress, shame, and regret. You didn't keep your word to the most important person in your life — YOU. Because the coins act like magnets, when you make deposits in your account, your account grows and begins paying dividends. The result is that you begin magnetizing opportunities with ease. The opposite is also true. As your account shrinks from being out of integrity with yourself or others, opportunities bounce off of you and seem just out of reach when once they were plentiful. You may work hard and can’t seem to get further ahead. When this is happening, I tell clients to check their integrity account. ~ Have you failed to honor commitments to yourself or others? ~ Are you depleted? ~ Is your account overdrawn? Everything you do is creating a pathway in your brain to get you closer to what you want...or further away. You choose in every moment who you are, what you want, and why it matters. Leading with integrity doesn’t just impact your life; it creates ripple effects in your business, your team, and your ability to lead at the highest level. This is why the leaders in my Upside Leaders program learn to strengthen their integrity account and build a life that aligns with their values and vision. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to imagine yourself as a bank account. Where are you spending? Where are you investing? When and how are you making deposits? At the end of the month, quarter, and year, what do you want your statements to look like? Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance now more than ever.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 12, 2025
My mom and I had a rocky relationship growing up. After my Daddy left, I suppose I was more affected than anyone understood. This was the 1970's and 'divorce' was a dirty word. Folks don't want to talk about the emotional carnage it leaves. My mom was forced into a situation she didn't choose or want ... ... and me and my younger sister were left to deal with it the best we could. In my teens, I blamed my mom for lots of things — and was disrespectful to her more than I'd like to admit. Perhaps it was because we were more alike than not ... ... and I didn't have any tools to deal with how I felt. Regardless, when I left home after college, I didn't leave on great terms. And at the time, I was too stubborn to make amends. Yes, there were seasons when I didn't speak to her or she didn't speak to me. And I never felt good when those were going on. At 55 years old, I have dealt with and healed the heartache, trauma, and pain that happened early on in life. It's given me deep compassion and wisdom ... and I desire to be able to love like Mother Mary does. This has helped me tremendously in my leadership coaching practice. While my mom and I still have our bumps now and then, today she's one of my favorite people to spend time with. Even when I'm frustrated or she pushes my buttons, I love who she is. I tell clients you can determine what you value by examining where you invest your time, energy, or money. My mom gets a lot of all three ... and I wasn't with her on Mother's Day yesterday. And we've got plans next month to go to the Jersey shore together as a family — as well as four other getaways, and one just the two of us. Whether you're close to your mom or not, or whether she's here or passed away, I hope you can reflect on one good memory today. Just one. If you're a mom, I hope you had a happy Mother’s Day. We don’t become strong leaders because everything goes smoothly. We become strong because we’ve lived through what we thought might break us. We lead how we heal. The work I’ve done with my mom ... learning to forgive, to listen, to understand ... that’s the same work I bring into the room with clients. You can't lead people well if you haven't faced your own stuff. The more I’ve grown, the more space I can hold. The more I’ve softened, the stronger I’ve become. And the more I’ve healed, the more clarity I have when it comes to what truly matters. That’s leadership. It's the transformation more than the titles or the wins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to reflect on one part of your story that shaped who you are today. Maybe it’s something you used to hide or pretend didn't happen. Ask yourself: how does this part of my journey still influence how I lead, decide, or relate to others? The goal isn’t to fix anything — it’s to get honest about how your inner story is shaping your outer leadership. Because the more whole you become, the more powerfully you can lead.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
May 7, 2025
Siam struggled for years and tried everything he knew to do. First, he rebuilt his website. Then, he spent money getting people to listen to his podcast. Next, he mapped out a social media strategy with a digital marketing agency. Lastly, he went all in on paid advertising. He was working long hours, missing out on time with his family. And Siam’s bank account kept shrinking, and he couldn't figure out why nothing seemed to be working. And that’s when we met. Siam was the older brother of a friend of mine, and she thought I could help him see the missing piece. I agreed to meet with him over Zoom. He was direct and told me he wasn't sure why his sister wanted us to meet. I, too, was direct with him and shared that she watched him struggle in business -- and believed the work I do would be valuable to jumpstart new opportunities. I shared my desire to listen and be of service if he was interested. Still a bit bristly in his demeanor, he said he wanted to hear what I had to say. After I asked a few questions, over 30 minutes, he softened and started to open up about the business. I began putting the pieces together and could see that Siam thought he had to do business like everyone else, and it was killing him. He spent the last 24 months trying to grow the business with very little to show for it, and his confidence had taken a hit. I could see through his bravado with a whole lot of tenderness because I’ve been there. When you don’t stack the wins fast enough, everything around you starts to feel like a loss. You begin doubting your worth and value, and when that happens, ... ~ it’s hard to build a great website, ~ it's hard to write on social media, and ~ it's hard to attract the people you’re called to serve. Sometimes, you can't see what you need to shift, so you start chasing tactics trying to fix the problem. Rarely are tactics the issue for a stunted career or a stalled business venture. If you don’t first figure out who you are, what you want, and why it matters, none of the tactical elements for business growth will work for you. You've got to get clear on your mission, values, and vision. From there, you can look at patterns getting in the way. We all have blind spots, and no one can see their pitfalls on their own. When you get clarity, confidence follows. Then, bigger opportunities will start to show up. Yet, if you could see your blocks, you'd remove them. Siam got that he couldn’t walk this journey alone. The best leaders get it. To get the greatest ROI, focus on leadership. Focusing on tactics, technology, or other shiny objects won't get you the big paycheck. Siam and I worked together one-on-one, and he got his leadership IQ dialed in. I was also able to help him write new marketing materials -- after he got clear, and the results led to a 39% increase in business. Today, he’s making his mark on the world. Increase your leadership IQ because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify the one thing that is draining your energy and not delivering results. Maybe it’s a commitment that no longer aligns, a habit that is having you overwork, or a task someone else could handle. Let it go. Growth isn’t about doing more; it’s about making room for what truly matters. When you clear distractions, you create space for divine opportunities to flow. Today, remove one thing that’s holding you back and trust that what’s meant for you will rise in its place.
