How to Handle Your Inner Critic
Lisa Marie Platske • December 5, 2018
After I got married, I walked away from my career in Federal law enforcement.
When I turned in my resignation, I didn’t realize it would be the end as I envisioned finding inspiring work in a similar agency.
Because I never met anyone who owned their own business and I didn’t take any business classes in college, owning a business never crossed my mind.
When I made the decision to open a business vs. getting another job in the criminal justice field, I didn’t realize I would be taking a journey in self-development.
Starting out, I had countless voices in my head that got in the way of my success.
I thought that having an inner critic was one-of-a-kind and incredibly unique to me because I didn’t have a business background and was stepping into an arena where I lacked experience.
Sometimes my inner critic whispered her messages quietly and other times she roared, criticizing my actions with a sharp tongue.
And the voices felt like the enemy, although they were on some level intended to keep me safe.
Over time, I discovered that this inner critic came from a place of fear, worry, or overwhelm.
Unfortunately, it was incredibly challenging to move forward in my business when these voices were at there loudest.
Research shows that people can feel your energy when you’re operating in a place of fear, even if you are portraying confidence and optimism.
This made making important calls and sitting down to write curriculum feel like monumental tasks.
While I’ve heard teachers speak about talking louder and muscling out your inner critic, I’ve always found it was better to accept, acknowledge and befriend the voice.
It wasn’t an acknowledgment that this was the voice of truth, rather an internal voice that had come from looking at some of life’s experiences through a narrow lens.
I recognized that if I wanted to quiet the critical voice and create a more positive perspective, I needed to heighten my awareness, gain understanding, and sometimes give myself a reality check, be patient, and then take action.
I began paying attention to when I was triggered and what exact words or phrases I would hear–and what meaning I was assigning to those words and phrases.
Then, I acknowledged the statement, noticing what part – if any – felt true in that moment.
Finally, I would identify what new language I wanted to create when I came up against this particular emotion again.
For me, it was never about making any part of who I am wrong.
It was always about noticing and awareness so that I could stand in a place of choice rather than reaction.
Today, I’m fortunate to have chosen friends who want to see me succeed.
They will speak up if they hear me say something that sounds like an old habit or pattern that isn’t serving me.
And, I’ve discovered that every leader that I’ve had the good fortune to coach or mastermind with has had those same voices… I wasn’t that unique after all. 🙂
This is why reaching out for support is a must on your leadership journey.
Reaching out can feel vulnerable and uncomfortable, but comfort doesn’t change the world.
And, ultimately, feeling alone and unsupported isn’t vulnerable, it’s isolation and doesn’t move your forward.
So, stand strong in your commitment to make a positive difference in the world…because the world needs you and your brilliance.
Action:
The Upside Challenge of the week is to identify some phrases your inner critic uses to keep you small or stuck. Take the time to acknowledge how the fearful words were meant on some level to keep you safe and protected. Can you comfort your own inner critic and thus yourself so that you can move forward differently? Reach out to someone to share your experience– and whether you are able to shift perspective and begin to take actions.
See Upside. Be Upside. Lead Upside.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 23, 2026
You can believe the best or worst about people. It’s less lonely to believe the best in them, yet that's really hard to do, especially when you've been burned over and over. When I think about leadership as a whole, this is one of the hardest elements to master because people are human. ~ They're going to get stuff wrong. ~ They're going to say things you don't like. ~ They're going to hurt your feelings, even if you don't want to admit it. At some point, most folks give up trying or at least caring. It's often easier to numb or ignore than to deal with a disappointment. Yet numbing or ignoring doesn't change the body's reaction internally to the situation. To get to a place where you are able to believe the best in folks takes work. There is no leadership pill or shortcut. At least not one that I've ever found. One of the biggest flexes is being able to hold space for someone when they've wronged you. I remember years ago reading an article about Richard Branson, and one of his employees who had stolen from him. Branson told the manager to speak to him—and give him a second chance. A second chance?!? Are you kidding me?!? That's a break in integrity and grounds for removal in any industry. Reading this had me wonder what Branson knew about leadership that at the time I didn't. To take it a step further, my curiosity increased and I wondered what would happen if I did something like this in my own life. It felt awkward to try this idea on as I had long-rooted beliefs that certain behaviors were vehemently wrong—and should be punished. Was it possible that leadership required unconditional love? Now, this didn't mean being a doormat and letting someone walk all over you. Anyone who knows me understands that's never gonna happen. Yet this new perspective, this new lens, had me curious about what would happen if I led from that place. Over the years, I can say it hasn't been the easiest thing to do—and it's been the most rewarding. I still have folks come back to me who wronged me telling me how much they respect the way I handled the situation. My greatest desire for folks is that they lead their lives in a way that honors the core of their being—their divine mission and purpose. And it's really hard to do that when you're steeped in judgment, blame, or shame-inducing behaviors. Love is the answer, regardless of the question. Because you can choose to believe the worst in people. Or you can choose to see the best in people. It's always your choice. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one person who has disappointed or frustrated you. Take one step from your highest self that keeps your heart open. Speak with calm. Acknowledge something they did right. And release the story you’ve been holding. Lead from love today.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 16, 2026
Life’s little synchronicities. Have you noticed them? Something happens that was too meaningful to be a coincidence. ~ Meeting that person. ~ Getting that call. ~ Having the impossible become possible?!? Perhaps you’re thinking about someone, and then they call. How does that happen?!? Or, you get a bill, and you've got no idea how you’re going to pay it. And then, poof! ... the exact amount of money you need just shows up. I’ve experienced countless events like these throughout my life. And while some people believe they are random, I understand in the depth of my being that these experiences are signs from the Holy Spirit to get my attention or answer a prayer. When you are in co-creation with all of Life, you get messages to confirm you’re on the right path. When I’m in ease and grace, greater wealth, opportunities, and relationships flow into my life. It’s magical. However, you have to be open to notice the signs in the first place. Every synchronicity carries wisdom for the journey. When you lean into the whispers of the Holy Spirit, life opens in ways you couldn’t script on your own. Stay open. Stay expectant. What you’ve been seeking may already be moving towards you in ways you can’t yet see. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stay on the lookout for meaningful synchronicities throughout your days. Each time one happens, jot it down so you don’t forget. At the end of the week sit with your list and speak your gratitude aloud for every moment that aligned for you.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 9, 2026
“You can’t quit your job to open a business. You don’t even know anything about business.” I get it. Taking a leap of faith doesn’t make sense. That’s why it’s called faith. So I took the leap of faith anyway. “That’s not the way we do that here.” I understand. And I created a new way of doing business that is more effective—and fun! “Why must you be such a troublemaker?” I don’t know what you mean. I get there are rules within the system—and I chose to create a new system. “That’s not possible.” Sure it is. I just did it. “You’re being reckless. You have responsibilities.” It depends on how you look at it. I see unlimited possibilities. These are real-life conversations I've had with folks in different seasons of my life. See, the rewards of courageous leadership are immense. Questioning 'what if...' to create 'what is' has been my journey. And it’s probably yours, too. You can’t live out your mission by playing by the rules of a broken world. Don’t let the “we’ve always done it this way” paradigm get in the way of making a positive difference on the planet. Remember, there’s always a way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop letting “we’ve always done it this way” slow your impact. Take a process, workflow, or system that isn’t serving your mission and start redesigning it. Remember, there’s always a way to make a bigger difference and it starts with your decision to do things differently.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 2, 2026
You have been hard-wired for greatness so stop trying so hard to be something other than who you are. I see it all the time. Folks who tie themselves into knots, seeking the approval of others. Oh, it's not conscious. Most leaders would tell you that they're comfortable being their own boss, in charge of their time. Behind closed doors, many of them have told me something different. And that's because conflict, being misunderstood, and being vilified are pretty crummy. Most folks want to be liked. They want to be valued and appreciated for the effort they've put in. Your greatest gift to the planet is to be fully, completely, and unapologetically who you are. Doing that may come with some pretty harsh consequences ... which is why most leaders are willing to sell out. The thing that isn't always self-evident about compromising your values and beliefs is that every night you're stuck with you. You have to look at yourself in the mirror. You are the only one who understands the choices you've made—right, wrong, or indifferent. When the day is done, the truth always meets you in the quiet. It asks whether you stood in integrity or traded pieces of yourself to keep the peace. Leadership requires decisions that don’t win applause. It often asks you to hold your ground when others want you to bend. Living aligned with who you are may cost you approval or relationships. Yet, it will never cost you your soul. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to name a decision you’ve been avoiding because it feels risky or uncomfortable. It could be ending a partnership that no longer serves your vision, raising the standards for a client, or closing a door that keeps you from your calling. Take one bold, aligned action this week that honors your integrity and the leader you were created to be.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 23, 2026
You can believe the best or worst about people. It’s less lonely to believe the best in them, yet that's really hard to do, especially when you've been burned over and over. When I think about leadership as a whole, this is one of the hardest elements to master because people are human. ~ They're going to get stuff wrong. ~ They're going to say things you don't like. ~ They're going to hurt your feelings, even if you don't want to admit it. At some point, most folks give up trying or at least caring. It's often easier to numb or ignore than to deal with a disappointment. Yet numbing or ignoring doesn't change the body's reaction internally to the situation. To get to a place where you are able to believe the best in folks takes work. There is no leadership pill or shortcut. At least not one that I've ever found. One of the biggest flexes is being able to hold space for someone when they've wronged you. I remember years ago reading an article about Richard Branson, and one of his employees who had stolen from him. Branson told the manager to speak to him—and give him a second chance. A second chance?!? Are you kidding me?!? That's a break in integrity and grounds for removal in any industry. Reading this had me wonder what Branson knew about leadership that at the time I didn't. To take it a step further, my curiosity increased and I wondered what would happen if I did something like this in my own life. It felt awkward to try this idea on as I had long-rooted beliefs that certain behaviors were vehemently wrong—and should be punished. Was it possible that leadership required unconditional love? Now, this didn't mean being a doormat and letting someone walk all over you. Anyone who knows me understands that's never gonna happen. Yet this new perspective, this new lens, had me curious about what would happen if I led from that place. Over the years, I can say it hasn't been the easiest thing to do—and it's been the most rewarding. I still have folks come back to me who wronged me telling me how much they respect the way I handled the situation. My greatest desire for folks is that they lead their lives in a way that honors the core of their being—their divine mission and purpose. And it's really hard to do that when you're steeped in judgment, blame, or shame-inducing behaviors. Love is the answer, regardless of the question. Because you can choose to believe the worst in people. Or you can choose to see the best in people. It's always your choice. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one person who has disappointed or frustrated you. Take one step from your highest self that keeps your heart open. Speak with calm. Acknowledge something they did right. And release the story you’ve been holding. Lead from love today.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 16, 2026
Life’s little synchronicities. Have you noticed them? Something happens that was too meaningful to be a coincidence. ~ Meeting that person. ~ Getting that call. ~ Having the impossible become possible?!? Perhaps you’re thinking about someone, and then they call. How does that happen?!? Or, you get a bill, and you've got no idea how you’re going to pay it. And then, poof! ... the exact amount of money you need just shows up. I’ve experienced countless events like these throughout my life. And while some people believe they are random, I understand in the depth of my being that these experiences are signs from the Holy Spirit to get my attention or answer a prayer. When you are in co-creation with all of Life, you get messages to confirm you’re on the right path. When I’m in ease and grace, greater wealth, opportunities, and relationships flow into my life. It’s magical. However, you have to be open to notice the signs in the first place. Every synchronicity carries wisdom for the journey. When you lean into the whispers of the Holy Spirit, life opens in ways you couldn’t script on your own. Stay open. Stay expectant. What you’ve been seeking may already be moving towards you in ways you can’t yet see. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stay on the lookout for meaningful synchronicities throughout your days. Each time one happens, jot it down so you don’t forget. At the end of the week sit with your list and speak your gratitude aloud for every moment that aligned for you.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 9, 2026
“You can’t quit your job to open a business. You don’t even know anything about business.” I get it. Taking a leap of faith doesn’t make sense. That’s why it’s called faith. So I took the leap of faith anyway. “That’s not the way we do that here.” I understand. And I created a new way of doing business that is more effective—and fun! “Why must you be such a troublemaker?” I don’t know what you mean. I get there are rules within the system—and I chose to create a new system. “That’s not possible.” Sure it is. I just did it. “You’re being reckless. You have responsibilities.” It depends on how you look at it. I see unlimited possibilities. These are real-life conversations I've had with folks in different seasons of my life. See, the rewards of courageous leadership are immense. Questioning 'what if...' to create 'what is' has been my journey. And it’s probably yours, too. You can’t live out your mission by playing by the rules of a broken world. Don’t let the “we’ve always done it this way” paradigm get in the way of making a positive difference on the planet. Remember, there’s always a way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop letting “we’ve always done it this way” slow your impact. Take a process, workflow, or system that isn’t serving your mission and start redesigning it. Remember, there’s always a way to make a bigger difference and it starts with your decision to do things differently.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 2, 2026
You have been hard-wired for greatness so stop trying so hard to be something other than who you are. I see it all the time. Folks who tie themselves into knots, seeking the approval of others. Oh, it's not conscious. Most leaders would tell you that they're comfortable being their own boss, in charge of their time. Behind closed doors, many of them have told me something different. And that's because conflict, being misunderstood, and being vilified are pretty crummy. Most folks want to be liked. They want to be valued and appreciated for the effort they've put in. Your greatest gift to the planet is to be fully, completely, and unapologetically who you are. Doing that may come with some pretty harsh consequences ... which is why most leaders are willing to sell out. The thing that isn't always self-evident about compromising your values and beliefs is that every night you're stuck with you. You have to look at yourself in the mirror. You are the only one who understands the choices you've made—right, wrong, or indifferent. When the day is done, the truth always meets you in the quiet. It asks whether you stood in integrity or traded pieces of yourself to keep the peace. Leadership requires decisions that don’t win applause. It often asks you to hold your ground when others want you to bend. Living aligned with who you are may cost you approval or relationships. Yet, it will never cost you your soul. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to name a decision you’ve been avoiding because it feels risky or uncomfortable. It could be ending a partnership that no longer serves your vision, raising the standards for a client, or closing a door that keeps you from your calling. Take one bold, aligned action this week that honors your integrity and the leader you were created to be.
