Healing The Past to Lead from My Whole Self

Lisa Marie Platske • May 12, 2025

My mom and I had a rocky relationship growing up.


After my Daddy left, I suppose I was more affected than anyone understood.


This was the 1970's and 'divorce' was a dirty word.


Folks don't want to talk about the emotional carnage it leaves.


My mom was forced into a situation she didn't choose or want ...

... and me and my younger sister were left to deal with it the best we could.


In my teens, I blamed my mom for lots of things — and was disrespectful to her more than I'd like to admit.


Perhaps it was because we were more alike than not ...

... and I didn't have any tools to deal with how I felt.


Regardless, when I left home after college, I didn't leave on great terms.


And at the time, I was too stubborn to make amends.


Yes, there were seasons when I didn't speak to her or she didn't speak to me.


And I never felt good when those were going on.


At 55 years old, I have dealt with and healed the heartache, trauma, and pain that happened early on in life.


It's given me deep compassion and wisdom ... and I desire to be able to love like Mother Mary does.


This has helped me tremendously in my leadership coaching practice.


While my mom and I still have our bumps now and then, today she's one of my favorite people to spend time with.


Even when I'm frustrated or she pushes my buttons, I love who she is.


I tell clients you can determine what you value by examining where you invest your time, energy, or money.


My mom gets a lot of all three ... and I wasn't with her on Mother's Day yesterday.


And we've got plans next month to go to the Jersey shore together as a family — as well as four other getaways, and one just the two of us.


Whether you're close to your mom or not, or whether she's here or passed away, I hope you can reflect on one good memory today. Just one.


If you're a mom, I hope you had a happy Mother’s Day.


We don’t become strong leaders because everything goes smoothly.


We become strong because we’ve lived through what we thought might break us.


We lead how we heal.


The work I’ve done with my mom ... learning to forgive, to listen, to understand ... that’s the same work I bring into the room with clients.


You can't lead people well if you haven't faced your own stuff.


The more I’ve grown, the more space I can hold.


The more I’ve softened, the stronger I’ve become.


And the more I’ve healed, the more clarity I have when it comes to what truly matters.


That’s leadership.


It's the transformation more than the titles or the wins.


ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to reflect on one part of your story that shaped who you are today.


Maybe it’s something you used to hide or pretend didn't happen.


Ask yourself: how does this part of my journey still influence how I lead, decide, or relate to others?


The goal isn’t to fix anything — it’s to get honest about how your inner story is shaping your outer leadership.


Because the more whole you become, the more powerfully you can lead.


By Lisa Marie Platske June 25, 2025
Fifteen years ago, a Chinese medicine doctor read my bloodwork and told me if things didn’t change I would have less energy in 5 years, and people would tell me it was just aging. That one conversation has led me on a long journey with a singular desire: to be a more optimal version of who I am in all areas of my life. Over the years, things would happen in my life that would take me off-course. Behaviors and habits that once seemed manageable, at times felt impossible. Inevitably, my long-time commitment to healthy living was something that got challenged regularly by the people around me, family and friends alike. There have been several times on this journey where I will wake up, understanding something I'm doing needs to change. Immediately. I can't always put my finger on why, yet the signs are there. Going through the motions without the incredible excitement I used to feel about my business A growing task list Questioning my ability My answer used to be to ignore my physical health and just work longer hours hoping to push through what felt like a slump. When I listen to the prompting that something needs to change, I re-commit to what matters most. The longer I've done this, the more I've realized that I can only be healthy in mind and spirit when I'm healthy in my body. And this is one of the reasons we talk about the brain and sleep in the Upside Leaders Program. Because how you treat your body directly affects how you lead. Now, I’m taking more breaks than ever before, and have plenty of space to take regular walks and trail hikes on the farm. All of this allows me to move with intention throughout the day, living moment by moment. What’s been fascinating is that since I've done this bigger opportunities continue to come my way. It’s not the hustle that opens doors. it’s being aligned with who you are, what you want and why it matters. Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance now more than ever. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop and ask yourself: Where do you need to make a shift? God often reveals the need for a shift long before we act on it. It can be a strained schedule, a restless spirit, or a body that’s run down. Then take one aligned action. It can be clearing space on your calendar. Or going for a walk without your phone. Or going to bed earlier. The action doesn’t have to be dramatic and you don’t need to overhaul your life. It just needs to be intentional.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 16, 2025
For a good portion of my life, I found it difficult to hear God's voice. Mostly I heard just static. Every so often, I'd listen to a song or get a nudge to do something, and mostly it was just quiet in my prayer time. In 2020, something broke open for me. I had been in a terrible place, working very hard in a few different areas. Yet, overall, I felt my life was stuck - and I wasn't making any progress anywhere. I looked at closing my business down and getting a job. My head was hurting from running into what felt like stone walls, and I was plain tired, battered, and bloodied. And I was embarrassed that I wanted to throw the towel in on things I had been working on for years. While many of the leaders I was coaching were doing well, I couldn't figure out the missing piece for where I was standing. And I was getting angry as it seemed my whole life was on the verge of one big meltdown. On a walk in my neighborhood in Virginia, I looked up at my street sign. I lived on Faith Court. The irony of God bringing me there. I decided that I would just start talking to God, and began asking Him questions as if He were walking beside me. I'd often sent clients on God walks, and today I felt this was my last hope. As fast as the questions came, so did the answers. Pieces of my life became clearer and I got an explanation of what had been going on behind the scenes when I thought God had forgotten about me. At the end of my walk, I had a re-commitment to going where God was leading even if it didn't make sense. It was profound and has led me to where I am today. Maybe you’ve felt that silence, too. That deafening quiet when you’re asking for direction, begging for clarity, and all you get is static. And maybe you’ve also been tempted to quit—to let go of what once felt certain, just because the road got too hard, too confusing, too quiet. Yet at times this silence isn’t a void, it’s an invitation. What broke open for me didn’t come from striving harder. It came from walking with God like He was right there beside me—because He was. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to ask God one real question today. Just one. Go outside. Take a walk if you can. Leave your earbuds behind. Imagine Him walking with you, then ask. Not with fear. Not with desperation. Just… ask. And listen. You might be surprised by what you hear when you stop trying to figure it all out and simply make room for Him to respond. You don’t have to get it right. You just have to get moving.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 9, 2025
Have you ever struggled with taking action on what you really wanted? Have you ever wondered if you’re not living up to your full potential? Research shows most people regret the choices they didn't make and the chances they didn't take at the end of their life. Yet, I get how sometimes fear can paralyze you from moving forward with what you want most. Over the past several years, I've been learning how to walk by faith, moment by moment. And when I look back at my life, I realize this has been a journey that began a long time ago. I would never have left working in Federal law enforcement if I didn’t take the journey from fear to faith. When I made the decision to turn in my resignation, my dad wanted to know why I was going to move from the steady income of a 6-figure government gig... ... to a zero-dollars-promised opportunity opening up my own business. I had no business degree, knew no one who had ever owned a business, and was living 3000 miles away from my closest friend or family member. Still, I took the leap of faith and trusted a net would appear. That's what most folks don't get. You have to take the leap BEFORE the miracle can show up. The journey to get from there to where I am today wasn't a solo effort. The people around me shaped my growth. I chose to surround myself with folks who think differently — who have challenged me to grow and evolve way beyond what I knew. The right leadership and different communities I stepped into gave me the confidence to move forward, even when the path ahead wasn’t clear. That’s why I believe coaching and community are essential for anyone who wants to go beyond where they are at this moment. See, every day you get an opportunity to decide what you are going to do with your life. Moment by moment, time moves forward without regard to your answer. Where do you need to take a leap of faith? Remember, your life is simply the sum total of all of the choices you've made. If you’re not happy with where you’re at, make different choices. It really is that easy.  ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to examine your decisions and see where you might be playing it safe. Because comfort doesn't change the world.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 2, 2025
When I was at the bottom of the pit, I stood in the darkness wondering how I had gotten there. It was so dark that I couldn’t even see my hand in front of me. And, deep down I knew how I got there… … yet to admit the truth would mean I had to look at all of the actions I had taken to get me to the abyss I was in. It would require me to take personal responsibility and be accountable for my actions. At the time, denial seemed easier. Blaming others seemed simpler. So I did. ~ My family history. ~ My background. ~ My genetics. I traveled a long and winding road to discover that the light I was seeking was in me all along. It takes me back to a widely publicized interview of two brothers. One was wildly successful… a wealthy professional deeply respected by his peers. Another was homeless… an alcoholic living from street corner to street corner. When asked how they got to where they were, both of them credited their father. “See… my daddy was an alcoholic…” yet they each took different roads. One took the road of personal responsibility and accountability. The other took the road of shame and blame. The tale of two brothers was living out in my body at that moment in time. One of my clients who I worked with over 10 years ago sent me a message after seeing one of my Facebook posts. “I thank God for amazing people like you and for giving me the opportunity to benefit from your knowledge and guidance from the first day we met (even from a distance). Thank you for reminding us of the true meaning of life and for inspiring us to be our own person. “Go out and shine your light.” - Lisa Marie Platske. You can take credit for some of the positive changes I made in my life. May He continue blessing you and all the people around you. Biggest hug.” She was in the same pit I was in years ago, and now she’s thriving using the tools I gave her. Most of my clients are fighting for peace… … for health … for happiness… … for success… … for meaning. They’ve sacrificed for others and been left bleeding by people who they called “friend”, lover, and even sometimes spouse. Many of them have seen the worst of the worst, and have the battle scars to prove it. And there is a piece of them that understands they too are destined for More. That there is a reason they’ve lived through this. I have had that same revelation and it’s why I’ve been to the bottom and am here now speaking about how to tap into your Divine Mission purpose and calling. I was given those experiences to be of service to others. There by the Grace of God go I. That is MY story. And, it just may be yours too. So if you’re trying to make sense of where you’re at, and it just feels dark all around you… ... remember the light within you. It’s there. And then remember, you weren't meant to walk this journey on your own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to think of a time you found yourself in a dark place, where it felt like everything around you was falling apart. Name one choice you made that led you there. Then, ask: “ What would it look like to choose differently today? ” Your past doesn’t define you. Your decision to rise does.
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By Lisa Marie Platske June 25, 2025
Fifteen years ago, a Chinese medicine doctor read my bloodwork and told me if things didn’t change I would have less energy in 5 years, and people would tell me it was just aging. That one conversation has led me on a long journey with a singular desire: to be a more optimal version of who I am in all areas of my life. Over the years, things would happen in my life that would take me off-course. Behaviors and habits that once seemed manageable, at times felt impossible. Inevitably, my long-time commitment to healthy living was something that got challenged regularly by the people around me, family and friends alike. There have been several times on this journey where I will wake up, understanding something I'm doing needs to change. Immediately. I can't always put my finger on why, yet the signs are there. Going through the motions without the incredible excitement I used to feel about my business A growing task list Questioning my ability My answer used to be to ignore my physical health and just work longer hours hoping to push through what felt like a slump. When I listen to the prompting that something needs to change, I re-commit to what matters most. The longer I've done this, the more I've realized that I can only be healthy in mind and spirit when I'm healthy in my body. And this is one of the reasons we talk about the brain and sleep in the Upside Leaders Program. Because how you treat your body directly affects how you lead. Now, I’m taking more breaks than ever before, and have plenty of space to take regular walks and trail hikes on the farm. All of this allows me to move with intention throughout the day, living moment by moment. What’s been fascinating is that since I've done this bigger opportunities continue to come my way. It’s not the hustle that opens doors. it’s being aligned with who you are, what you want and why it matters. Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance now more than ever. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop and ask yourself: Where do you need to make a shift? God often reveals the need for a shift long before we act on it. It can be a strained schedule, a restless spirit, or a body that’s run down. Then take one aligned action. It can be clearing space on your calendar. Or going for a walk without your phone. Or going to bed earlier. The action doesn’t have to be dramatic and you don’t need to overhaul your life. It just needs to be intentional.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 16, 2025
For a good portion of my life, I found it difficult to hear God's voice. Mostly I heard just static. Every so often, I'd listen to a song or get a nudge to do something, and mostly it was just quiet in my prayer time. In 2020, something broke open for me. I had been in a terrible place, working very hard in a few different areas. Yet, overall, I felt my life was stuck - and I wasn't making any progress anywhere. I looked at closing my business down and getting a job. My head was hurting from running into what felt like stone walls, and I was plain tired, battered, and bloodied. And I was embarrassed that I wanted to throw the towel in on things I had been working on for years. While many of the leaders I was coaching were doing well, I couldn't figure out the missing piece for where I was standing. And I was getting angry as it seemed my whole life was on the verge of one big meltdown. On a walk in my neighborhood in Virginia, I looked up at my street sign. I lived on Faith Court. The irony of God bringing me there. I decided that I would just start talking to God, and began asking Him questions as if He were walking beside me. I'd often sent clients on God walks, and today I felt this was my last hope. As fast as the questions came, so did the answers. Pieces of my life became clearer and I got an explanation of what had been going on behind the scenes when I thought God had forgotten about me. At the end of my walk, I had a re-commitment to going where God was leading even if it didn't make sense. It was profound and has led me to where I am today. Maybe you’ve felt that silence, too. That deafening quiet when you’re asking for direction, begging for clarity, and all you get is static. And maybe you’ve also been tempted to quit—to let go of what once felt certain, just because the road got too hard, too confusing, too quiet. Yet at times this silence isn’t a void, it’s an invitation. What broke open for me didn’t come from striving harder. It came from walking with God like He was right there beside me—because He was. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to ask God one real question today. Just one. Go outside. Take a walk if you can. Leave your earbuds behind. Imagine Him walking with you, then ask. Not with fear. Not with desperation. Just… ask. And listen. You might be surprised by what you hear when you stop trying to figure it all out and simply make room for Him to respond. You don’t have to get it right. You just have to get moving.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 9, 2025
Have you ever struggled with taking action on what you really wanted? Have you ever wondered if you’re not living up to your full potential? Research shows most people regret the choices they didn't make and the chances they didn't take at the end of their life. Yet, I get how sometimes fear can paralyze you from moving forward with what you want most. Over the past several years, I've been learning how to walk by faith, moment by moment. And when I look back at my life, I realize this has been a journey that began a long time ago. I would never have left working in Federal law enforcement if I didn’t take the journey from fear to faith. When I made the decision to turn in my resignation, my dad wanted to know why I was going to move from the steady income of a 6-figure government gig... ... to a zero-dollars-promised opportunity opening up my own business. I had no business degree, knew no one who had ever owned a business, and was living 3000 miles away from my closest friend or family member. Still, I took the leap of faith and trusted a net would appear. That's what most folks don't get. You have to take the leap BEFORE the miracle can show up. The journey to get from there to where I am today wasn't a solo effort. The people around me shaped my growth. I chose to surround myself with folks who think differently — who have challenged me to grow and evolve way beyond what I knew. The right leadership and different communities I stepped into gave me the confidence to move forward, even when the path ahead wasn’t clear. That’s why I believe coaching and community are essential for anyone who wants to go beyond where they are at this moment. See, every day you get an opportunity to decide what you are going to do with your life. Moment by moment, time moves forward without regard to your answer. Where do you need to take a leap of faith? Remember, your life is simply the sum total of all of the choices you've made. If you’re not happy with where you’re at, make different choices. It really is that easy.  ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to examine your decisions and see where you might be playing it safe. Because comfort doesn't change the world.
By Lisa Marie Platske June 2, 2025
When I was at the bottom of the pit, I stood in the darkness wondering how I had gotten there. It was so dark that I couldn’t even see my hand in front of me. And, deep down I knew how I got there… … yet to admit the truth would mean I had to look at all of the actions I had taken to get me to the abyss I was in. It would require me to take personal responsibility and be accountable for my actions. At the time, denial seemed easier. Blaming others seemed simpler. So I did. ~ My family history. ~ My background. ~ My genetics. I traveled a long and winding road to discover that the light I was seeking was in me all along. It takes me back to a widely publicized interview of two brothers. One was wildly successful… a wealthy professional deeply respected by his peers. Another was homeless… an alcoholic living from street corner to street corner. When asked how they got to where they were, both of them credited their father. “See… my daddy was an alcoholic…” yet they each took different roads. One took the road of personal responsibility and accountability. The other took the road of shame and blame. The tale of two brothers was living out in my body at that moment in time. One of my clients who I worked with over 10 years ago sent me a message after seeing one of my Facebook posts. “I thank God for amazing people like you and for giving me the opportunity to benefit from your knowledge and guidance from the first day we met (even from a distance). Thank you for reminding us of the true meaning of life and for inspiring us to be our own person. “Go out and shine your light.” - Lisa Marie Platske. You can take credit for some of the positive changes I made in my life. May He continue blessing you and all the people around you. Biggest hug.” She was in the same pit I was in years ago, and now she’s thriving using the tools I gave her. Most of my clients are fighting for peace… … for health … for happiness… … for success… … for meaning. They’ve sacrificed for others and been left bleeding by people who they called “friend”, lover, and even sometimes spouse. Many of them have seen the worst of the worst, and have the battle scars to prove it. And there is a piece of them that understands they too are destined for More. That there is a reason they’ve lived through this. I have had that same revelation and it’s why I’ve been to the bottom and am here now speaking about how to tap into your Divine Mission purpose and calling. I was given those experiences to be of service to others. There by the Grace of God go I. That is MY story. And, it just may be yours too. So if you’re trying to make sense of where you’re at, and it just feels dark all around you… ... remember the light within you. It’s there. And then remember, you weren't meant to walk this journey on your own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to think of a time you found yourself in a dark place, where it felt like everything around you was falling apart. Name one choice you made that led you there. Then, ask: “ What would it look like to choose differently today? ” Your past doesn’t define you. Your decision to rise does.
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